


On Earth

by songbirdwrites



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-09
Updated: 2017-02-16
Packaged: 2018-09-23 04:07:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,846
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9640067
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/songbirdwrites/pseuds/songbirdwrites
Summary: Hey yall. This fic is dead, jsyk. No more updatesJasper redemption ficWritten after "That Will Be All", so any new information beyond that is being disregarded. Also, tagged for jaspearl later on, but it's mostly about Jasper's emotional arc, the relationship stuff is more on the side.Short chapters cause that's how I roll.





	1. Fog

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I don't own Steven Universe or any associated materials. It's all Rebecca Sugar's

Jasper was only vaguely aware of the world outside of her churning mind. It was as though some subconscious part of her brain had decided that, since she had no way of entering that world, she shouldn't pay it any attention.

She didn't know how long she'd been like this, half gone, half still here, every moment locked in a desperate, primal attempt to reform. She was trapped with her thoughts, spiraling out of her control. They spun into sentences, into monologues that blended together, and all she could do was grasp at the threads and try to make sense of it all. She was still herself, on some fundamental level, but she was unraveling, and there was nothing she could do about it. 

She noticed when the world around her changed, but it was only another thread she could grasp at, and not quite take hold of. 

She felt like screaming. Anything to rip through the endless strain of babble in her head, but every attempt failed. Her thoughts had no volume, yet they were persistent.

She was felt something like pressure, before she burst free from her confinements, letting her physical body once again take it's place in the world. 

With her body back in it's slot of reality, Jasper recognized the pressure. Panic welled up in her throat as she scrambled to the edge of the fountain, collapsing to her hands and knees, wet, and breathless. She was met with even more water, salty and littered with rose petals. She felt like a jumpy cat. She _looked_ like a jumpy cat. Exposed, exposed.

"It worked?"

She noted the fact that her hair didn't reach her shoulders. It wasn't a conscious choice, none of it had been, and she felt exposed, so exposed. Raw and fresh. Without looking, she could tell that her hair was short, and that her body bore the same uniform she'd worn when she'd first emerged from the ground. It was programmed into her, somewhere that even corruption couldn't touch. 

In between her desperate gasps, she managed to steal a glace up. In front of her, Rose was beaming. Anger replaced the panic in her throat. Rose really was a coward.

Of course she'd wait until Jasper was at her most vulnerable to attack. She'd let her be ripped apart, and just barely pieced back together before finally delivering the final blow. And she was so _smug_ about it.

"You," Jasper tried, but it came out as nothing but a low, waterlogged, growl. She tried to raise her arm but it splashed back to the ground in a way that must of seemed menacing, for Rose took a tentative step back, smile vanishing from her features. 

"J- Jasper?" She squeaked in that strange voice, that didn't sound anything like how it should. "I just want to help,"

This only stoked the growing flame in the pit of Jasper's stomach. After everything she'd done, Rose wasn't allowed to say that. She was the reason everything was wrong. Jasper had felt broken for five thousand years, and it was all her fault.

"Rose Quartz," She growled out. The word was recognizable this time, and it caused the gem to cower. As if she still thought she was fooling anyone with her act. 

"I'm not Rose," She managed to be firm, despite the fear in her eyes.

In Jasper's fog, she actually entertained that possibility, but quickly dismissed it. Rose was playing with her, and soon, she'd end it all. 

Fine then, break her, get it over with. Jasper was too tired to fight. Too angry, too confused, too relieved, and too utterly miserable. She fell to the floor with another splash, and let the water pool and ripple around around her.

_I concede._

She stayed like that for a long time, drawing in quick, ragged breaths, waiting. Rose didn't do anything. She hardly moved, except to sit down where she was. 

Jasper's mind was still reeling. She was starting to take back control, she could tell, but corruption still ran through her, just under the surface. That monster was prepared to leap forward at any moment, but for now, she could suppress it. 

Her breaths began to even out, and after an indefinable stretch of time. They sat in silence, only broken by the trickling of water. Jasper shifted, and Rose shifted in response. She let out a long breath, and Rose mimicked. She let her eyes fall open. "You're not Rose Quartz?" She asked. 

"My name is Steven, I'm her son,"

"Where's Rose Quartz?"

"I- " He struggled with the words. "She gave up her physical form. To have me,"

Jasper mulled over what that meant. Rose was a strange creature, she always had been, but this was next level, even for her.

"So, she's dead?"

"Yeah- I mean, it's complicated,"

Rose Quartz was dead. And of her own devices. All that Jasper had wanted for almost as long as she could remember was for Rose to be wiped out of existence, but this felt flat. Perhaps it was this creature she had left in her wake that made her defeat seem unexciting. Or the small rebellion that still did her bidding that made it feel unimportant. Or maybe it was the perfectly intact gem that the human wore that stopped Jasper from feeling any better. 

"What is this place?"

She had finally taken a moment to look around. She was staring up at a statue of the deceased rebellion leader. Maybe she could invoke her own satisfaction by smashing it. 

They seemed to be in some sort of spring. Various forms of vegetation decorated the place, like Rose's own shrine to everything anti-gem. It smelled like salt, though that was most likely the liquid Jasper was lying in.

Above them, stars dotted the still darkening sky. Jasper could just make out a few star systems that she'd been to before.

"Um, it's a healing fountain. But, we shouldn't stay here," The gem, who was not Rose, said, seeming to suddenly remember his objective. "I wasn't even supposed to come here," He added, though mostly to himself.

Jasper lumbered to her feet, starting to once again feel alert and like herself. She felt clean, and ready. She wasn't sure what was coming, but she was going to meet it head on. 

"Come on," Not Rose said, taking her wrist in a surprisingly forceful grip.

Before she knew it, she was being dragged along, up a staircase, through a garden and onto a warp pad. Not Rose clapped his hands, and they were surrounded by light. Jasper let out a breath at the familiarity of it all. The light dissipated as quickly as it had come, and they found themselves in some sort of room.

It was wooden and messy. If Jasper had learned anything about humans in the time she'd spent on Earth, she knew that this must be where one of them lived. There was a bed, and a couch, and some sort of screen. For Jasper, this cemented that the creature in front of her wasn't a real gem. None would bother with all of the luxuries this thing afforded himself. 

"You probably need to rest," He said, stepping off of the platform. "You can take the couch,"

"I just reformed," Jaspered huffed. "I don't need rest," A reforming period was the most relaxation a quartz solider would ever need. Anything beyond that was merely a waste of resources. 

Not Rose furrowed his eyebrows, concern marking his features. "Jasper, you look exhausted." 

Did she? It didn't matter. She had things to do. There was information she still needed to gather, and then a report back to homeworld would be in order. She needed to find the rest of the Crystal Gems, and find out what Rose had been planning on Earth, and find out the status of the cluster, and see if her-

"You need to sleep."

Sleep? "Gems don't sleep."

"Yes they do. It's easy, come here." Jasper let herself be guided to the couch by the wall. She was a little big for it, but she followed not Rose's instructions anyway. 

"Just lay down, and close your eyes." She did as instructed. 

"Now, just let yourself drift off..." Not Rose slowly backed away from the couch and up the stairs, making soft whooshing noises as he went. 

Jasper squeezed her eyes shut, focusing as much as she could on drifting off. 

"Goodnight, Jasper," Not Rose said when he finally settled into bed.

"Goodnight, Steven."

The boy's snores quickly filled the room. Jasper stopped focusing after a while, giving up on going to sleep. Instead she listened to the rhythm of Steven's breath, the hum of the electronics in the room, and the faint but gentle sound of waves breaking on the beach. Her brain filled with a sort of fog, though it was pleasant, unlike what she'd experienced while she was bubbled. She felt sluggish, and nothing processed as fast as it should have. 

After a while, a door opened behind the warp pad. Jasper didn't move, feeling much to out of it to think logically about what was happening. 

The Amethyst walked out, yawning as she padded across the floor. She didn't notice Jasper as she made her way past and to the kitchen. She opened the fridge, casting light across the room. 

Jasper winced at the sudden brightness, but Amethyst closed the door quickly with an armful of food, and was back the way she came. 

The Crystal Gems were _here_ , or at least the Amethyst was. Jasper tried to let that sink in, but it didn't get very far. 

Before she knew it, she was drifting off into the first sleep of her life.


	2. Dream #1

_She was on Earth, still fresh, and confused, but determined. She knew she was the crown jewel of the Beta kindergarten. Mostly because she had been told little else since she'd burst out of the ground. She repeated that to herself over and over, trying to let it wash away her nerves._

_She had fought in a total of three battles already. She'd watched the others, her sisters, the only thing she knew in this strange new world, poof at the hands of the Crystal Gems. They were stolen, kidnapped, never to return to the homeworld that they were told so much about._

_But she had made it. She'd got out unscathed, and free from capture, with a new resolve and a new mantra. Don't ever grow attached to something you might lose._

_Quickly, she had risen to the top. It was like the Beta kindergarten was graded on a sliding scale, and the incompetence of the other jaspers had allowed her to soar to incomprehensible heights._

_Her memory centered on one moment. After she had stopped fidgeting outside the palanquin, after she'd taken a deep breath and her first step. The moment she first met Pink Diamond._

_All at once, the fighting had been worth it. Every loss she'd suffered, and every gem she'd crushed in her bare hands, was all worth it, as long as it was for her._

_Pink Diamond was an exception to her rule. After all, she wasn't something that Jasper could lose. She was more powerful than any Quartz solider could dream of, and her life was going to be infinite._

_She was the most divine, amazing, beautiful gem that Jasper had ever laid eyes on. And the warmth in her chest confirmed it. There was no way that a gem that made her feel this amazing, could ever do any wrong._

_The Diamond had ran a hand through Jasper's hair, short and choppy, and told her how proud she was. Her special Jasper._

_"My diamond," Was all that Jasper could respond, breathless and overwhelmed by everything she'd felt for the gem in front of her._

_Pink Diamond had only laughed. It was nothing like the way the other quartz's chuckled deep in their throats, it wasn't the short, sarcastic laugh of a disapproving Agate. It was sweet and genuinely joyous. It was perhaps, the most sincere laugh that Jasper had ever heard, or ever would hear._

_"You keep fighting for me, okay Jasper?"_

With a crash and a yell, Jasper was jolted awake.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, hope you enjoyed!
> 
> I know my chapters are excruciatingly short, but just bear with me, theres more to come


	3. Lightning

Jasper blinked wearily. Around her there was movement, and noise, but she was still shaking away the remains of her dream. Sleep was pressing down on her like a thick blanket that she wasn't able to force away. 

"No, please! _I_ unbubbled her-"

Grey light filtered in through the windows, casting a sinister glow on the gems in front of Jasper. The sound of rain was loud, pounding against the thin roof. 

"Steven, you can't just go into the bubbles like that!"

Jasper was on her feet in an instant, all thoughts of sleep and Pink Diamond gone from her mind. Once again she was being attacked in her moments of vulnerability, though this time it was her own fault. She wouldn't let another Crystal Gem lull her into that state like Steven had. 

For now she was in battle mode. She took her stance, thousands of years of practice dictating her moves for her. She analyzed her opponents.

There was the fusion, whatever it was called. She was clearly the leader of this pack. The Amethyst, made wrong, just like all the other Beta Jaspers. And the Pearl, trying to have a will of her own. No sign of Peridot the fresh traitor, or water witch.

Finally she had a chance to smash these gems back into the ground, once and for all. 

"Jasper," The Pearl growled. Jasper let the corner of her mouth twitch up. She hadn't had a chance to fight this one yet. Really, she should have gone for the fusion, cut off the snakes head, but she couldn't help herself. The Pearl was a feisty creature, and she'd love to put her in her place. 

She lunged for the Pearl, despite Steven's cries for her to stop. However, her opponent was small, and easily side stepped Jasper's aggressive motions. Off balance, she'd be at a disadvantage, and sure enough, the others were at her in seconds. 

The Amethyst gave an easy flick of her whip and Jasper's arms were out of commission, tied tightly to her sides. The fusion moved in for the final blow, but Jasper fell to her back, ready to fight with her feet if need be. 

"Wait!" 

Steven was between them in an instant, shielding Jasper with Rose Quartz's signature shield. _Idiot._ This was a terrible move, strategically. It would only cause animosity amongst his team, and Jasper wasn't a good enough ally for that to be a sufferable consequence. 

"Steven, stand aside," The fusion said calmly, though is sounded like she was biting her tongue.

"But, Garnet, _please_ ," 

"I know you just want to help her, but you can't. She's _not ready_ ,"

As they continued with their power struggle, Jasper carefully shimmied her way out of her confines. She remained where she was on the floor, waiting for the perfect moment.

"I can't just wait for her,"

"Yes, we can. That's why we bubble them,"

_Not yet. Not yet._

"But then she'll never be ready! She can't learn anything in a bubble,"

Jasper leapt to her feet, hands coming to form fists in front of her. 

"If you two are done," She drawled, making to push Steven aside, but rethinking it in the last moment. "I believe we were fighting," She faced the fusion, but all her focus was on the Pearl, off guard and to the side. 

"No, we're not," The fusion did push Steven aside, albeit gently. She stared Jasper in the eye for a moment, expression incomprehensible behind her visor. "We're done here,"

She cast a glance to Steven, who shrunk slightly under her gaze, before stalking off, past the warp pad and into the door behind it.

Jasper was left to exchange a confused glance with the Amethyst, and a disdainful one with the Pearl. 

"Leave," The Pearl said, after a few moments of silence. 

" _Pearl,_ " Steven pleaded. She ignored him, taking a step closer to Jasper. 

"Don't ever bother us again,"

Jasper narrowed her eyes, drawing herself up to her full height. When the Pearl didn't waver, she turned for the door. As she left, she was sure to the slam it open hard enough to splinter the wood. It swung pitifully on it's hinges, squeaky and unable to close, but she was already gone.

Rain dumped over her, soaking her skin and making her hair stick to her face and neck. She trudged through the sand, cursing the bad weather. She hadn't even been reformed for a day and she had already been drenched twice.

She walked with purpose, and determination, though she had no idea where she was going. She should be walking the other direction. The remainder of the rebellion was gathered behind her, and every step was taking her farther away from them. Didn't she want them finished?

But Rose was dead. What good were a few cheap freaks when they didn't even have anyone to guide them? 

Rose _was_ dead. She could stop worrying about that now, and focus on her initial mission. But the Peridot she was escorted had defected. She was a solider, muscle, sent to protect a technician. One who had decided a life of exile was for her.

The cluster then. Peridot's mission had been to check on the status of the cluster and make sure it was ready to emerge on schedule. But that had been compromised, and besides, it was a technician's job. Jasper wouldn't know where to begin. 

Home then. There was nothing for her here. She could go back to homeworld and live her life. She could go back to serving her government. She could go back to her routine of training and fighting. 

Dread bubbled up in her stomach. She had practically had to beg to accompany Peridot on this excursion, and only for the off chance that she might find some hint of Rose Quartz. Her revenge mission gave her life purpose again. But now, Rose was dead. And emptiness was filling her once more. 

A dog trotted towards Jasper, dripping and grimy from the rainfall. It barked at her a few times, low and menacing. 

Jasper barked back, louder and more menacing. The dog tried again, but Jasper motioned towards it, ready for another fight if need be. Finally the creature whined and skittered away. _Pathetic._

She found herself at the edge of town. She paused, scoping the streets for signs of life. Thankfully, there wasn't any. She didn't need to be around any more humans. 

She was tired of them, with their big ideas and optimistic life views. Didn't they realize how small and insignificant they were?

As she walked down the street, she caught a glimpse of a few through a shop window. She had meant to look away, but couldn't help but stare at the three figures.

Two stood behind a counter, one busying themself with some kind of paper, the other casually leaning forward. A third sat on the counter leaning back to talk to the other two. They were all laughing, smiles stretching out their faces, eyes half closed with mirth.

Jasper tilted her head, trying to get a better look, or perhaps trying to understand the joke. One of the humans spotted her through the glass, and whispered to their friends. Smiles faded, and fear replaced it. They all stared, though they tried to pretend they weren't. Jasper watched for a few more moments, but now they knew she was there they were boring and predicatble. 

She was messy and grimy. Dripping, just like that stupid dog. Not to mention she was seven feet tall and clad in a white alien military uniform. Even back on homeworld, people stare. A jasper was a rare sight, especially a properly formed one.

She continued on, no longer following her straight, efficient path, but snaking through the alleys and side roads. She still walked with determination, but she had nowhere to go. She was finding the fastest route to nowhere.

She made an effort not to look in any more windows, she really did, but the warm glow from this one drew her in like moth to a flame. It was packed, filled to the brim with people avoiding the downpour, and picking up an early morning coffee. She peered through the window, to the two humans at the cash register. They checked a client out together, working together to complete each step in double the time. Every motion flowed into one another, filling the spaces so nothing was left out. When they were done they leaned against the counter, whispering and giggling to one another. An image of the other beta Jasper's flashed across her mind.

Jasper found that she had raised her fingers to the glass without noticing, leaving small, watery fingerprints that were quickly washed away by the persistent rain. She took a few steps back, taking a deep breath and continuing on her erratic path. 

She made the decision to leave town, mostly subconsciously. It was a terrible place to avoid humans, and a distraction to someone trying to run away. It was on the very outskirts that she saw the pair of humans outside in the rain. They were curled together under an umbrella, looking out over the storm clouds, which were breaking in the distance, and quietly murmuring to each other every now and then. Jasper scoffed. She thought humans didn't like the rain. Perhaps they were celebrating it's disappearance.

She found herself on the far side of the outlet that harbored the quaint town. In the distance, a swingset was visible on the beach . If was old, rusty, and entirely out of place. 

Jasper's feet carried her across the grass and through the sand, out to the decrepit structure.

She thunked down onto the swingset with a clang and a creak from the weary chains. She pushed her toes into the still wet sand and let the momentum push her back. 

The rain was beginning to dissipate; and the wind was dying down. The sun was coming up out over the ocean horizon, painting the sky various shades of orange. Jasper glanced down to her own skin, striped orange like the rising sky.

In these quiet moments, Jasper's head started to spin again. Thoughts slipped in without her consent, muddling the ideas she needed to focus on. _Where are you going? What are you doing? What would Pink Diamond think of me now?_

No.

She squeezed her eyes shut and repeated it. _Where are you going? What are you doing? Where are you going? What are you doing? Where are you going? What are you-_

She pushed off from the swingset, letting it jangle and clang behind her. The rain had stopped, but the air was still wet. 

She wandered forwards, toward the comfort of the breaking waves. She sucked in a breath of salt air, letting the sea water crash over ankles. 

Another step forward, and another, until she was up to her hips, past the breaks, so the waves could wash up her stomach. Her hands dangled in the water. The sun was growing from a sliver, becoming more and more visible above the horizon.

She flexed her hands, feeling the cool liquid around them. It reminded her of Lazuli.

She would have liked this. The gentle wash of ocean water. Before Jasper ruined her perception of the ocean, that was.

Thinking about Lapis made Jasper's heart ache. She still missed Malachite, even if it had been wrong or unhealthy, or whatever it was that Lazuli had said. She wanted to feel like that again. Powerful, secure, and not alone.

Permanent fusion was sounding like an amazing idea. Did Garnet feel like that all the time? Did the Ruby and the Sapphire that made up that creature feel the same way Jasper did? Had their hearts ached this way when Jasper had forced them apart? Was this thing she felt for Lapis what Garnet called love?

The sun was up in full now and the sky was beginning to fade into blue. The moon was visible out in the corner of Jasper's vision. The waves were getting bigger with every passing moment, surging up Jasper's chest. Not even a day had passed, and she was wet yet again.

"Jasper!"

She swung around at the sound of her name, surprised to see Steven, up to his knees in the ocean water. His hands were clapped around his mouth like a megaphone, and he called her name into them once again.

"Jasperrrrrr!"

"Steven, go back to the gems!" She yelled back. The wind was picking up, and the growing waves were reaching farther and farther up his body. It wasn't safe out here for a human like him. 

"Jasper, come back with me!" He waded forward, coming up to his waist and soaking his t-shirt.

"Steven, leave!" She let her words out like a growl, hoping to scare him back to the safety of the shore. The boy was not so easily deterred.

"Jasper, please! I'll talk to Garnet, and Pearl! I'll-" 

A surge of water washed over Steven, pushing him under the rushing waves.

Jasper let out a shrill "Steven!" before rushing to his aid.

She pulled him out of the water with one hand.

"Steven? Are you okay?"

He coughed up a bit of water as Jasper dragged him to the beach, but said "I'm fine, it's just a little water-"

"You could have gotten hurt! You have to go home-"

She shouldn't have cared. He was related to Rose, and he was a crystal gem. Logic stated that she should've let the boy drown. But ever since Steven had healed her at the fountain, Jasper had felt strangely responsible of him. She was in his debt.

"Jasper! Step away from Steven!" 

Come _on._ In a sense, she was relieved to see the Crystal Gems. They'd take Steven away to safety and he wouldn't be her problem anymore. On the other hand, she was currently looming over the boy like she was going to eat him, and she doubted they would take any of her interactions lightly.

"No, guys it's okay!"

There he does again, trying to be a tiny diplomat. Someone should really bring the kid to homeworld, show him how to get things done. 

"So we're fighting again?" A smile stuck to Jasper's face and she couldn't shake it. Even if she was pathetic and directionless, even if she had nothing to gain from it, she really wanted to crush these Crystal Gems into powder.

Garnet made a move towards Jasper, as if to attack, but Steven was between them again.

"STOP!"

Even Jasper was a little stunned at his suddenly commanding tone. She quirked an eyebrow but gave an appreciative nod. Maybe Garnet wasn't the ringleader afterall.

"Steven," Garnet warned.

"No, _listen_ to me. I'm a part of this team, too!"

Jasper sighed and lowered her fists. This was going to be long, again. But she didn't have anything better to do.

"Remember Peridot? She changed. Jasper can change, too! She just needs our help,"

"Standing right here," Jasper said, though she was easily ignored. 

"Oh Steven, Peridot was never that much of a threat to begin with. Jasper on the other hand, is a quartz solider, and she tried to kill us. _This morning._ " Pearl reminded, kneeling down to look steven in the eyes.

"No, Steven's right," Amethyst said, stepping to his side. "Jasper deserves a second chance," She glanced to Jasper as she said it, who narrowed her eyebrows in response. 

She was done with these gems deciding her fate for her. No one was going to fix her, heal her, stamp out her homeworld ideals. This creature of Rose's was too confident in his own abilities. And most definately, no one was going to pummel her like Garnet certainly wanted to. 

"Are you finished?" Jasper cut in, coming to stand between the two sides. 

"Not yet," Garnet replied, making a move for her head. Jasper caught her wrist easily and smiled. Finally, they were getting things done.

Steven protested as they swung at each other, back and forth, neither managing to land a blow. Soon the other two were backing Garnet and Jasper was outnumbered. Steven didn't take sides, always the neutral party.

Jasper could feel adrenaline pumping through her, and another, uncomfortable sensation rippling under her skin. Her breaths became shallow and her brain was going fuzzy. Amethyst attacked, Garnet attacked, but Jasper was losing the stream of the battle. Thoughts were slipping into her mind without her permission. Pictures of homeworld, her ship, her diamond, flashed across her vision at critial moments and she stumbled.

The discomfort in her flesh twisted into sharp, uncontrolable pain, and she fell to the ground, howling, vision going blurry.

And then someone hit her.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm always down for some feedback, so leave a comment
> 
> Thanks for reading :)


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